KABUL // When Nov 4 rolls around and a new US president is elected, Ahmad Khan will not be expecting any great changes in the two countries he has made his home. "The worst things that have been done to Afghanistan are by America," he said.
The life of Mr Khan, who asked that his real name not be used, is intertwined with Washington and Kabul. He has seen firsthand how their fates are linked, and it makes him fear for the future. "America, Britain and Nato have deeply screwed up, or maybe they have another purpose and want the situation to be like this so they can stay here. But no, that won't happen - they will become another Russia," he said.
Mr Khan is Afghan by birth, but until recently had spent much of his adult life in the United States. Over the last 29 years, his life has, in many ways, mirrored the often tragic and occasionally hopeful history of American involvement in this country. He graduated from Kabul University in the late 1970s and planned on pursuing a career in journalism. Afghanistan was not yet in turmoil but, with a communist government in power and an insurrection already under way, everything was about to change.
The Soviet Union eyed the situation warily and the United States, via the Central Intelligence Agency, saw an opportunity to engage its rival in conflict, a war that would eventually rival Vietnam in terms of bloodshed. As this started to happen, Mr Khan made a decision millions of Afghans would ultimately follow - he escaped with his family to Pakistan. Only his father remained behind, choosing instead to fight on behalf of the mujahideen faction Hizb-e-Islami against the Soviets.
"After that, me and dad didn't talk for 10 years," Mr Khan said. His father eventually joined the family in the United States in the 1990s. After living in Pakistan for a year, the family were given asylum in the United States and with it the offer of free housing and education. Mr Khan, though, refused to take any benefits and began working in a corner shop. Next he took a job in a bank and finally, in 1996, he launched his own California-based company.
By that time Kabul was in ruins. Washington had sponsored the mujahideen's struggle against Soviet occupation but then abandoned Afghanistan. Rival militia groups battled for control of the capital and Hizb-e-Islami, which had received the most CIA support, sent rockets raining down on the city. Tens of thousands of people were killed and the population's longing for peace and security ushered in the Taliban.
Mr Khan watched all of this from afar. "In the Taliban time we forgot about Afghanistan - we thought it would never come back," he said. "From time to time we would go to the senate and demonstrate. "By god, those people [America] used us to mess up the Russians, achieved their purpose, then left." When al Qa'eda attacked the United States on September 11 2001, and US-led forces ousted the Taliban from power later that year, Mr Khan hoped Washington would commit to rebuilding the country it had helped destroy.
His optimism did not last long. "They had a sweet taste, a golden opportunity that I haven't seen in the history of Afghanistan, except once when the country was founded," he said. "The first time when [Hamid Karzai] was selected by the international community as a president was OK. But the second time, when he was elected by the power of the people, he had an open hand and a big field to choose from. We had scholars, professors, a lot of smart people who could have been ministers. So when they brought back the old leaders I said, 'we are finished'."
However, Mr Khan still chose to return. Leaving his American wife and two children behind, he arrived in Kabul and launched his own company here. Although the nature of the work cannot be disclosed for risk of revealing his identity, it involved doing business outside the capital. A couple of years later and security has deteriorated to the extent he cannot even visit his home province of Logar without fearing for his life.
Meanwhile, he refuses to let his son and daughter visit Afghanistan - a place they have never seen. "If they were killed by a suicide bomber on the road to the airport could I forgive myself? OK, I am an Afghan and if I die so what? A lot of Afghans die every day, our blood doesn't have any worth. But I cannot do that to an American," he said. This war looks set to take centre stage in the race for the White House. Both John McCain and Barack Obama have vowed to refocus efforts on Afghanistan and a surge in troop numbers is expected next year.
Mr Khan is a Democrat who, having supported Hillary Clinton, now plans to vote for Mr Obama. George W Bush, he believes, has severely jeopardised Washington's chances of making amends here. "In the book The Art of War, the first thing it says is that you should not open two fronts. They came to Afghanistan, then went to Iraq. What the hell were they doing in Iraq?" he said. Mr Khan, who gave his age as "close to 50", regrets leaving his homeland all those years ago. He thinks if he had stayed he could have helped stop the country from falling apart.
Now he intends to die in the land of his birth, whatever else the future may hold. @Email:csands@thenational.ae