Ramadan diaries: 'It is when God gives us all a chance to cleanse our souls'

Razan Hamed of Saudi Arabia, an administrator at Little Smarties Nursery in Abu Dhabi, longs for home during this time of year.

Suhoor, the meal before sunrise, is a long feast for Razan Hamed, 24, and her family. She spends most of the night eating with the aunt, uncle and four cousins she lives with in central Abu Dhabi, leaving only a few hours for sleep before she must go to work. Ms Hamed has lived in the UAE for six years since coming to study IT engineering at the University of Sharjah. She was born and raised in Saudi Arabia. Her Saudi father and Sudanese mother are both Muslims, and faith is important to her.

"Ramadan is a very special time of year," she says. "It is when God gives us all a chance to cleanse our souls, wash ourselves of any sin and celebrate everything in our lives. I think all over the world it has become more of a cultural event than an Islamic one. It is a time for family to get together. Really I'd like to spend it all back in Saudi but in recent years I haven't been able to because of my studies."

Ms Hamed, who works as an administrator at Little Smarties Nursery in Khalifa City, says fasting is easier in her home country. "In Saudi everyone fasts so it is much easier. When the whole community is joined in one action you really feel part of something. Here I am surrounded by non-Muslims who are eating and drinking as normal. I don't like seeing it but of course I understand. It just makes it harder for me at times."

Ms Hamed works from 10am to 3pm during Ramadan. She enjoys the work at the nursery but misses her home. "If I was in my home in Jeddah, I would be going to Mecca every weekend to pray. It is such a special experience I can hardly put it into words. The place is very spiritual and when we pray all together in unity it is the most beautiful thing. It is like we are one. We pray for ourselves, for our families and even for the dead. Allah's presence is so strong it is like I can feel Him there."

After work Ms Hamed returns to her aunt's house, and breaks her fast as the sun sets with her relatives. They have dates, laban and a small bowl of soup, and take part in the maghrib prayers. "The moment when I break my fast I am so thankful for everything I have. Being hungry and thirsty all day is Allah's way of teaching us what it is like for people who have nothing to eat and who have no money. It is for this reason that part of the tradition of Ramadan is to give money to charity or to help others. We do extra prayers during Ramadan and make sure we keep ourselves completely pure. No bad thoughts about anyone, no swearing and no gossiping."

After the hour of prayers, Ms Hamed goes to bed until it is time to prepare the suhoor feast. Her night's sleep is broken in two throughout Ramadan. She gets four hours in the early evening and four hours in the early morning. "Day becomes night and night becomes day," she says. "Night-time is when we celebrate and enjoy family time and day is obviously time for fasting and reflection." At 10pm she rises and helps her aunt prepare the suhoor feast. They sit down at 1.30am to a heavy meal of harees (a meat and grain style of porridge), samboosa, rice, chicken and vegetables, followed by plenty of Arabic sweets.

"The meal goes on until it is time for morning prayers," she says. "We eat whatever we want as it is really the only meal we have in 24 hours. Afterwards, I always feel very tired as the body starts to digest the food, so I have some more sleep until it is time to get up for work." Although she was born and grew up in Saudi Arabia, Ms Hamed chooses not to wear the traditional abaya and sheila in the UAE. It does not undermine her faith in any way, she says.

"In the Quran it specifically asks that when you pray you should only have your face showing. Naturally when I pray I cover up, following the instructions. But otherwise it does not specify that you should remain covered at all times. I believe the most important thing is how you feel in your heart. What's the point in covering up if you don't feel it from the inside? "I know how I feel about God and whether I wear a hijab or not this isn't going to change. I think God judges us on our feelings and our intentions, and as long as we show a decent amount of self-respect the rest shouldn't matter." @Email:[e-mail]