ABU DHABI // As a successful lawyer, no one would have thought “Sue” was heavily addicted to alcohol and drugs.
Not only did she hide her addiction for years but during her 35-year stint as a lawyer in the United States she also represented her own drug dealers in court.
“I never understood that the first drink was the one that got me drunk,” said Sue, who now lives in Dubai. “But one drink is not enough and a thousand is not enough.”
Sue started drinking in her teens before dabbling in drugs in the 1960s.
She then turned to harder drink and drugs and, in a spell working in an mental health institution before studying law, she would steal patients’ medicine.
During her binges Sue experienced black-outs and was the driver in a hit-and-run incident.
She also had an abortion during this time because of her issues.
As she began her legal training, she continued to use alcohol and drugs, even while pregnant. Her son was born severely underweight.
It was while supporting a family member who was receiving treatment for his own alcohol addiction that counsellors advised Sue that she also had a problem.
“A sense of ease and comfort came over me,” said Sue. “I never pictured, being a trial attorney, that scenario where somebody would call me an alcoholic.
“I thought I was crazy, I thought I was unlucky, that I was a misfit, neurotic or psychotic and I certainly had no idea how to fix it.”
Sue stayed at the centre for seven weeks.
After returning home she went to 90 meetings in 90 days, as recommended by the Alcoholic Anonymous 12 steps programme.
Sue has not drunk alcohol or used drugs since 1980.
It begs the question: after 34 years does she still need to attend regular AA meetings?
Quite simply, yes. Without support and a sponsor in the UAE, Sue could not cope.
“I would go crazy,” she said.
AA is run by its members. For the UAE chapter, Sue handles media information and speaks at conferences, schools and public meetings about addiction, using a pseudonym.
Sharing her story in public can be difficult but she feels it is important to give back. The kindness of a stranger plays a large part.
After five years sober, Sue wanted to repair some of the harm she caused. This included a hit-and-run in 1975, when she smashed into another car after a drinking binge.
Sue hired a private investigator who found the car, its owner, and paid her hospital bill and the US$19,000 damage to the car.
She wrote to the victim, admitting to being an alcoholic, apologising for the crime and asking to pay any losses. It caused countless sleepless nights because of her fears about the reaction.
But days later, Sue received a phone call from the victim who, instead of seeking retribution, thanked her for the letter saying it had given her hope for her alcoholic grandson.
Sue cries when talking about the call, a period she marks every year by sending the woman a red rose.
Speaking out now and encouraging others to seek help is a small price to pay for that kindness she was shown, she said.
jbell@thenational.ae
FFP EXPLAINED
What is Financial Fair Play?
Introduced in 2011 by Uefa, European football’s governing body, it demands that clubs live within their means. Chiefly, spend within their income and not make substantial losses.
What the rules dictate?
The second phase of its implementation limits losses to €30 million (Dh136m) over three seasons. Extra expenditure is permitted for investment in sustainable areas (youth academies, stadium development, etc). Money provided by owners is not viewed as income. Revenue from “related parties” to those owners is assessed by Uefa's “financial control body” to be sure it is a fair value, or in line with market prices.
What are the penalties?
There are a number of punishments, including fines, a loss of prize money or having to reduce squad size for European competition – as happened to PSG in 2014. There is even the threat of a competition ban, which could in theory lead to PSG’s suspension from the Uefa Champions League.
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Company Profile
Name: Thndr
Started: 2019
Co-founders: Ahmad Hammouda and Seif Amr
Sector: FinTech
Headquarters: Egypt
UAE base: Hub71, Abu Dhabi
Current number of staff: More than 150
Funds raised: $22 million
bundesliga results
Mainz 0 Augsburg 1 (Niederlechner 1')
Schalke 1 (Caligiuri pen 51') Bayer Leverkusen 1 (Miranda og 81')
TRAP
Starring: Josh Hartnett, Saleka Shyamalan, Ariel Donaghue
Director: M Night Shyamalan
Rating: 3/5
The past Palme d'Or winners
2018 Shoplifters, Hirokazu Kore-eda
2017 The Square, Ruben Ostlund
2016 I, Daniel Blake, Ken Loach
2015 Dheepan, Jacques Audiard
2014 Winter Sleep (Kış Uykusu), Nuri Bilge Ceylan
2013 Blue is the Warmest Colour (La Vie d'Adèle: Chapitres 1 et 2), Abdellatif Kechiche, Adele Exarchopoulos and Lea Seydoux
2012 Amour, Michael Haneke
2011 The Tree of Life, Terrence Malick
2010 Uncle Boonmee Who Can Recall His Past Lives (Lung Bunmi Raluek Chat), Apichatpong Weerasethakul
2009 The White Ribbon (Eine deutsche Kindergeschichte), Michael Haneke
2008 The Class (Entre les murs), Laurent Cantet
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In the Restaurant: Society in Four Courses
Christoph Ribbat
Translated by Jamie Searle Romanelli
Pushkin Press
Napoleon
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Three tips from La Perle's performers
1 The kind of water athletes drink is important. Gwilym Hooson, a 28-year-old British performer who is currently recovering from knee surgery, found that out when the company was still in Studio City, training for 12 hours a day. “The physio team was like: ‘Why is everyone getting cramps?’ And then they realised we had to add salt and sugar to the water,” he says.
2 A little chocolate is a good thing. “It’s emergency energy,” says Craig Paul Smith, La Perle’s head coach and former Cirque du Soleil performer, gesturing to an almost-empty open box of mini chocolate bars on his desk backstage.
3 Take chances, says Young, who has worked all over the world, including most recently at Dragone’s show in China. “Every time we go out of our comfort zone, we learn a lot about ourselves,” she says.
Keep it fun and engaging
Stuart Ritchie, director of wealth advice at AES International, says children cannot learn something overnight, so it helps to have a fun routine that keeps them engaged and interested.
“I explain to my daughter that the money I draw from an ATM or the money on my bank card doesn’t just magically appear – it’s money I have earned from my job. I show her how this works by giving her little chores around the house so she can earn pocket money,” says Mr Ritchie.
His daughter is allowed to spend half of her pocket money, while the other half goes into a bank account. When this money hits a certain milestone, Mr Ritchie rewards his daughter with a small lump sum.
He also recommends books that teach the importance of money management for children, such as The Squirrel Manifesto by Ric Edelman and Jean Edelman.
The specs
Engine: 1.5-litre turbo
Power: 181hp
Torque: 230Nm
Transmission: 6-speed automatic
Starting price: Dh79,000
On sale: Now
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