Emiratis urged not to end marriage for trivial reasons



Lawyer says lack of understanding of what partner will expect is leading to court.

ABU DHABI // Emirati couples are ending their marriages for trivial reasons because they “don’t understand their marital duties and responsibilities”, a divorce lawyer says.

Huda Al Falamarzy, of Mohammed Al Hashimi Advocates and Legal Consultants, said misunderstandings were the most common reason given by couples who had filed for divorce.

While the Abu Dhabi Judicial Department found divorce rates decreased last year from 2014, Ms Al Falamarzy said the rate among Emiratis was still extremely high.

“There isn’t a single day that goes by without me getting at least one consultation request from a man or woman wanting to divorce their partner,” she said. “For the silliest reasons, they file for divorce.”

These days it has become normal to request a divorce, unlike 10 to 15 years ago when a woman or man filed for divorce only in extreme situations, said Ms Al Falamarzy.

She said that in Islam divorce was the last resort and should never be a women’s first choice, especially when children were involved.

Ms Al Falamarzy blamed divorce rates on a lack of awareness going into a marriage of what each partner expected from it.

“I have had a woman ask for a divorce because her husband wanted her to cook every day.” The Family Guidance Division has been set up to resolve disputes amicably by asking couples to meet family counsellors before filing for divorce.

Last year, 75 per cent of 14,946 cases were resolved by counselling.

“Once the mediation is successful, the counsellor documents what was agreed between the two parties in what is called the family agreement,” said one counsellor.

“Once the spouses willingly sign the agreement, without any pressure from the counsellor, it becomes binding. The counsellor must devise legal, psychological and social solutions to steer away from divorce.”

One case presented to the division involved a woman who waited 14 years to have children with her husband.

When he insisted he was not at fault and merely wanted his spouse to “enjoy her life with him”, she insisted on the divorce.

Another wife pressed for divorce because her husband watched pornographic movies and cheated on her.

After three unsuccessful mediation sessions the couple insisted on ending the marriage, until their five-year-old daughter entered the room and began crying.

Seeing their child so upset made them rethink their decision.

“After five minutes of her crying they made up and changed their mind about the divorce,” the counsellor said.

“Most fights result from extramarital affairs, or from negative interference of parents.

“Then there is domestic violence, whether physical or verbal.”

salnuwais@thenational.com

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