When the South African-born actress Charlize Theron came to Dubai for the Atlantis party last year, she was one of the shiniest stars in a glittering array of guests. Perfectly groomed, glossy haired, elegantly dressed and with her handsome actor boyfriend, Stuart Townsend, in tow, she seemed like the coolest girl in town.
Now the 34-year-old has declared that she has obsessive compulsive disorder, which makes her irrationally anxious about untidy cupboards. These days, it seems you're nobody if you don't have a syndrome, an unexplained condition or a fashionable disorder, but worrying about untidy cupboards definitely takes the biscuit.
"I have a problem with cabinets being messy and people just shoving things in cabinets and closing the door," Theron says. "I will literally lie in bed and not be able to sleep because I'll be like: 'I think I saw something in that cabinet that just shouldn't be there.'"
Perhaps it's because she's just so perfect to look at that she feels the need to create a perceived flaw so the rest of us don't feel too bad about our imperfections. I just hope this "closet obsession" thing is catching. I could secretly inject my husband and younger daughter with the bug and miraculously there would be no bedrooms that look as if a bomb had exploded in the cupboards.
I definitely have a touch of Theron's syndrome. My husband is currently away and the house is immaculate, so I have nothing to nag about, no jammy knives left on coffee tables, no tubes of toothpaste squeezed in the middle rather than the end, no paperwork spilt all over the living room, waiting to be filed. It's really worrying. I feel sure I should seek help.
There are definitely fashions in syndromes. It's the same with allergies. Unaccountably, my eyes started streaming a couple of years ago during summer and the doctor said it was hay fever. It can strike at any time of life, depending what spores are floating around in the air or if move from country to country, she told me.
You can actually go hunting for syndromes online. I woke up at 4.30am the other day and couldn't get back to sleep again. It's happened a couple of times in the past and - oh joy! - I've discovered I may have a real one of my own: delayed sleep-phase syndrome.
To while away the hours, I found myself tidying my wardrobe and drawers in the wee small hours just like Charlize. I guess that means I've got two syndromes now. There must be a name for that in the medical books.
Could it be that the mighty British Broadcasting Corporation is finally listening to its viewers on the subject of female presenters "of a certain age"? Outraged licence payers have been telling them for years that they like seeing a few mature female faces on their screens.
In fact, when it comes to presenting the news, people actually prefer someone who knows what they are talking about - and might even have spent time as a reporter - to vacuous twentysomethings who read scripts written by somebody else as if the words have not had time to be processed by the brain.
Names of cities and of famous people are pronounced as if the presenters have never heard of them, and the chirpy tone in which they announce the name of the airhead soap star that is opening London's most famous store's winter sale doesn't change when it informs us that "another soldier has died in Helmand Province".
Over the years too much real talent has been given the heave-ho. Anna Ford, Moira Stuart and, more recently, Arlene Phillips were bounced from prime time slots amid howls of fury from viewers. The bosses paid not a blind bit of notice.
Now Mark Thompson, the BBC director general, has told his heads of news to find a female presenter of 50 or so to counter claims of ageism. I doubt if the elegant 65-year-old Ford will be tempted back, although I'd believe her if she announced on a news bulletin that scientists have discovered the moon is made of cream cheese. I hope she tells Thompson to hop off if he comes knocking at her door.
Stuart could easily make a comeback at 60 but she probably still feels bruised at being dumped after 30 years.
None of them will want to be brought in as a sop to protesters and shunted off into a graveyard slot. They'd be mad to accept anything less than prime time now that they've got Thompson on the ropes. Women like Stuart, Ford, Kate Adie are genuinely interested in news. They could all point to Azerbaijan on a map or pronounce Chechnya as if they've actually heard of it rather than the way Bridget Jones did when she was trying to impress Daniel Cleaver in the movie.
Other networks revere their ageing stars. Barbara Walters is 80, for heaven's sake, and still presenting The View on the ABC network. And last week Christiane Amanpour, at the age of 51, got a new show on CNN's prime time line-up.
Appointing just one older female newsreader may be too little but it's not too late for the Beeb to get the message. Where news is concerned, people want credibility. If a twentysomething reporter has that kind of authority that's fine, but few do. It shouldn't be too hard to find someone over the age of 50 with the necessary poise and gloss. They should just open their eyes and look around them.
Family squabbles can be so emotionally intricate as to be almost unbelievable, and often real life is much more interesting than fiction. The current court case punch-up between Tamara Mellon, the founder of the Jimmy Choo empire, and her mother reads like an episode of Dirty Sexy Money.
Mellon alleges her mother, Ann Yeardye, is refusing to hand over Mellon's share from a family trust, but the spat is given a fascinating little twist by Mellon's conviction that her mother is jealous of her looks and success and resented her closeness to her father, the late Tom Yeardye. Yikes. The plot is tailor-made for the fictional Darling family.
"My mother and I never got along, not even when I was a child," Mellon says. "She wanted to be me, I think, which seems terribly sad."
Both women are beautiful. Yeardye, now 70, used to be a Chanel model and Mellon, 42, is regularly photographed for fashion or society magazines, having made £100 million (Dh584m) from the shoe business.
If there's a grain of truth in Mellon's jealousy claims, it's a sad story. Trying to keep up with a daughter's youth and beauty is ultimately futile, although we see examples of it everywhere, especially among celebrities. Children may keep you young, but try to outshine them at your peril. Mothers end up looking a bit pathetic. They would discover a much greater sense of fulfilment by taking pride in their achievements rather than trying to trump them at every turn.
What is it with these tennis girls? No sooner have they tearfully announced their retirement than up they pop again ready to take on the world. The word "retirement" has become obsolete. Just weeks after Kim Clijsters came out of retirement at the grand old age of 25, the former number one Justine Henin, 27, says she's giving tennis another shot too.
The hunger for success of true champions clearly never goes away. Clijsters proved you can mix motherhood and championship sport by taking the US Open. Only players at this level understand the dedication it requires to stay at the top, the endless hours of training, battling injuries, building up stamina. You wouldn't blame them for occasionally showing a touch of weariness with that sort of regimen.
Henin says she misses the game too much and I think it's a fine thing that she has the courage, never mind the physical strength, to stage a comeback. There's nothing wrong with women just being women, even at the top of a demanding sport. Sometimes we just need a break.
Is it my imagination or is it really the case that since Showtime and Orbit joined forces, all the good movies and shows seem to be on channels I can't get. You would think that there would be a greater choice with the merger, but lately I seem to spend a lot of time flicking the control looking for something to watch.
I know that pay-per-view channels have to make money but it cheeses me off to feel I'm being ripped off. I already pay for a good mix of movies, series, sport and news, but all the newer stuff seems to have been surreptitiously moved to channels not included in my package.
I wonder if anyone else feels the same.
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What is an ETF?
An exchange traded fund is a type of investment fund that can be traded quickly and easily, just like stocks and shares. They come with no upfront costs aside from your brokerage's dealing charges and annual fees, which are far lower than on traditional mutual investment funds. Charges are as low as 0.03 per cent on one of the very cheapest (and most popular), Vanguard S&P 500 ETF, with the maximum around 0.75 per cent.
There is no fund manager deciding which stocks and other assets to invest in, instead they passively track their chosen index, country, region or commodity, regardless of whether it goes up or down.
The first ETF was launched as recently as 1993, but the sector boasted $5.78 billion in assets under management at the end of September as inflows hit record highs, according to the latest figures from ETFGI, a leading independent research and consultancy firm.
There are thousands to choose from, with the five largest providers BlackRock’s iShares, Vanguard, State Street Global Advisers, Deutsche Bank X-trackers and Invesco PowerShares.
While the best-known track major indices such as MSCI World, the S&P 500 and FTSE 100, you can also invest in specific countries or regions, large, medium or small companies, government bonds, gold, crude oil, cocoa, water, carbon, cattle, corn futures, currency shifts or even a stock market crash.
Company Profile
Name: Thndr
Started: 2019
Co-founders: Ahmad Hammouda and Seif Amr
Sector: FinTech
Headquarters: Egypt
UAE base: Hub71, Abu Dhabi
Current number of staff: More than 150
Funds raised: $22 million
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MATCH INFO
Manchester City 4 (Gundogan 8' (P), Bernardo Silva 19', Jesus 72', 75')
Fulham 0
Red cards: Tim Ream (Fulham)
Man of the Match: Gabriel Jesus (Manchester City)
The Perfect Couple
Starring: Nicole Kidman, Liev Schreiber, Jack Reynor
Creator: Jenna Lamia
Rating: 3/5
UAE - India ties
The UAE is India’s third-largest trade partner after the US and China
Annual bilateral trade between India and the UAE has crossed US$ 60 billion
The UAE is the fourth-largest exporter of crude oil for India
Indians comprise the largest community with 3.3 million residents in the UAE
Indian Prime Minister Narendra Modi first visited the UAE in August 2015
His visit on August 23-24 will be the third in four years
Sheikh Mohamed bin Zayed, Crown Prince of Abu Dhabi and Deputy Supreme Commander of the Armed Forces, visited India in February 2016
Sheikh Mohamed was the chief guest at India’s Republic Day celebrations in January 2017
Modi will visit Bahrain on August 24-25
The specs
Engine: 2.7-litre 4-cylinder Turbomax
Power: 310hp
Torque: 583Nm
Transmission: 8-speed automatic
Price: From Dh192,500
On sale: Now
UPI facts
More than 2.2 million Indian tourists arrived in UAE in 2023
More than 3.5 million Indians reside in UAE
Indian tourists can make purchases in UAE using rupee accounts in India through QR-code-based UPI real-time payment systems
Indian residents in UAE can use their non-resident NRO and NRE accounts held in Indian banks linked to a UAE mobile number for UPI transactions
BEETLEJUICE BEETLEJUICE
Starring: Winona Ryder, Michael Keaton, Jenny Ortega
Director: Tim Burton
Rating: 3/5
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If you go
The Flights
Emirates and Etihad fly direct to Johannesburg from Dubai and Abu Dhabi respectively. Economy return tickets cost from Dh2,650, including taxes.
The trip
Worldwide Motorhoming Holidays (worldwidemotorhomingholidays.co.uk) operates fly-drive motorhome holidays in eight destinations, including South Africa. Its 14-day Kruger and the Battlefields itinerary starts from Dh17,500, including campgrounds, excursions, unit hire and flights. Bobo Campers has a range of RVs for hire, including the 4-berth Discoverer 4 from Dh600 per day.
Company profile
Date started: January, 2014
Founders: Mike Dawson, Varuna Singh, and Benita Rowe
Based: Dubai
Sector: Education technology
Size: Five employees
Investment: $100,000 from the ExpoLive Innovation Grant programme in 2018 and an initial $30,000 pre-seed investment from the Turn8 Accelerator in 2014. Most of the projects are government funded.
Partners/incubators: Turn8 Accelerator; In5 Innovation Centre; Expo Live Innovation Impact Grant Programme; Dubai Future Accelerators; FHI 360; VSO and Consult and Coach for a Cause (C3)
Jawan
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Living in...
This article is part of a guide on where to live in the UAE. Our reporters will profile some of the country’s most desirable districts, provide an estimate of rental prices and introduce you to some of the residents who call each area home.
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