I was originally going to write about insider trading after overhearing a conversation at a funeral last week, during which a banker was advising the son of the deceased to consider playing the Beirut Stock Exchange. "It's a quick way to turn around a quick US$5,000 [Dh18,365] every so often," he assured him. Unaccustomed to the dizzy world of finance, the young man was sceptical. Surely there was risk? "Not if you have someone on the inside," said our man. Everyone nodded. Yes, they all agreed, one had to have "someone".
But then that idea dried up. The recently released Cellular competition intensity index looked like promising grist for the columnist's mill. It ranks Lebanon last among the 19 Arab countries. But we Lebanese know all this and don't even blink when our monthly mobile phone bill is way higher than that of, not only a Kuwaiti, Emirati or a Saudi, but also of a Londoner. So, I figured, no story there.
One genuine development was the announcement that in September we will have third-generation, or 3G, internet connectivity, a move that one telecommunications executive claimed would revolutionise the economy (and allow me to enjoy YouTube in all its uninterrupted glory). If it were true, it would certainly lift us off the bottom of speedtest.net's league tables, which this year ranked us last in download speed and second-to-last in upload speed. Even the Afghans have faster internet.
But all this is irrelevant while Lebanon faces the biggest threat to its stability since the end of the civil war. Last week's indictments, handed down to four Hizbollah members by the chief prosecutor of the special tribunal for Lebanon (STL), was not the anticlimax we were all expecting, and the prime minister Najib Mikati is under extreme pressure from the opposition March 14 bloc to back all international commitments and resolutions on Lebanon, including the STL, or step aside.
It is an increasingly common ultimatum in these parts but, given that on Saturday Hassan Nasrallah, the Hizbollah secretary general, said he would never allow his men to be turned in "not in 30 days, and not in 300 years", it is one that gives him little wiggle room.
To make matters worse, it has not been a good year for the economy. The tourist season has been virtually written off by the double whammy of a high-season Ramadan and unrest in neighbouring Syria. Now Lebanon faces isolation from the international community. Add to the mix the simmering tensions between the Sunni and Shia communities, a state of affairs already magnified by the Syria crisis, and suddenly from being the most stable country of the so-called Arab Spring, Lebanon has jumped to the front of the queue and threatens once again to become the violent prism through which the Middle East is viewed.
And all because of one man, whose influence has cast a shadow in one way or another over the country for nigh on 20 years. September, the month in which we are supposed to get super-fast internet, will mark the 19th anniversary of the arrival on the political scene of Rafik Hariri, a man who back then was the almost mythical billionaire from Sidon with a reputation for getting things done.
Back then, Lebanon was in a pitiful state. People sat around in darkness and paid for goods with wads of 1,000 pound (Dh2.40) and 500 pound notes. In February 1992 the US dollar cost 800 pounds. By September the price had nudged 3,000 pounds. Enter Hariri and almost overnight the dollar parachuted down to the 1,500 mark, where it has remained, albeit artificially, ever since.
Hariri rolled up his sleeves and set about Lebanon like a man possessed. As the years passed, his name became synonymous with unstoppable wealth and huge projects. In darker corners there were mutterings of his trying to "buy the country" but the reality was that had there been no Hariri, there was no one else standing in the wings with his vision, his muscle and his phone book. We felt the economic dynamism when Hariri rode into town, which is more than can be said for any other Lebanese leader in recent memory.
The dynamism has evaporated and we sit waiting to see if the government will thumb its nose at the international community. In a column in this newspaper last week, the American journalist Charles Glass asked: "How long will Lebanon's bankers and merchants, who include as many Shia as Sunnis and Christians, tolerate international isolation before banding together to demand that Hizbollah comply [with the tribunal]?"
After listening to Mr Nasrallah's speech, they will have their work cut out. Unlike those who play the stock market, they don't have someone on the inside.
Michael Karam is a communication and publishing consultant based in Beirut
11 cabbie-recommended restaurants and dishes to try in Abu Dhabi
Iqbal Restaurant behind Wendy’s on Hamdan Street for the chicken karahi (Dh14)
Pathemari in Navy Gate for prawn biryani (from Dh12 to Dh35)
Abu Al Nasar near Abu Dhabi Mall, for biryani (from Dh12 to Dh20)
Bonna Annee at Navy Gate for Ethiopian food (the Bonna Annee special costs Dh42 and comes with a mix of six house stews – key wet, minchet abesh, kekel, meser be sega, tibs fir fir and shiro).
Al Habasha in Tanker Mai for Ethiopian food (tibs, a hearty stew with meat, is a popular dish; here it costs Dh36.75 for lamb and beef versions)
Himalayan Restaurant in Mussaffa for Nepalese (the momos and chowmein noodles are best-selling items, and go for between Dh14 and Dh20)
Makalu in Mussaffa for Nepalese (get the chicken curry or chicken fry for Dh11)
Al Shaheen Cafeteria near Guardian Towers for a quick morning bite, especially the egg sandwich in paratha (Dh3.50)
Pinky Food Restaurant in Tanker Mai for tilapia
Tasty Zone for Nepalese-style noodles (Dh15)
Ibrahimi for Pakistani food (a quarter chicken tikka with roti costs Dh16)
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Our family matters legal consultant
Name: Dr Hassan Mohsen Elhais
Position: legal consultant with Al Rowaad Advocates and Legal Consultants.
SPECS
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Dirham Stretcher tips for having a baby in the UAE
Selma Abdelhamid, the group's moderator, offers her guide to guide the cost of having a young family:
• Buy second hand stuff
They grow so fast. Don't get a second hand car seat though, unless you 100 per cent know it's not expired and hasn't been in an accident.
• Get a health card and vaccinate your child for free at government health centres
Ms Ma says she discovered this after spending thousands on vaccinations at private clinics.
• Join mum and baby coffee mornings provided by clinics, babysitting companies or nurseries.
Before joining baby classes ask for a free trial session. This way you will know if it's for you or not. You'll be surprised how great some classes are and how bad others are.
• Once baby is ready for solids, cook at home
Take the food with you in reusable pouches or jars. You'll save a fortune and you'll know exactly what you're feeding your child.
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The biog:
Favourite book: The Leader Who Had No Title by Robin Sharma
Pet Peeve: Racism
Proudest moment: Graduating from Sorbonne
What puts her off: Dishonesty in all its forms
Happiest period in her life: The beginning of her 30s
Favourite movie: "I have two. The Pursuit of Happiness and Homeless to Harvard"
Role model: Everyone. A child can be my role model
Slogan: The queen of peace, love and positive energy
ARGENTINA SQUAD
Goalkeepers: Franco Armani, Agustin Marchesin, Esteban Andrada
Defenders: Juan Foyth, Nicolas Otamendi, German Pezzella, Nicolas Tagliafico, Ramiro Funes Mori, Renzo Saravia, Marcos Acuna, Milton Casco
Midfielders: Leandro Paredes, Guido Rodriguez, Giovani Lo Celso, Exequiel Palacios, Roberto Pereyra, Rodrigo De Paul, Angel Di Maria
Forwards: Lionel Messi, Sergio Aguero, Lautaro Martinez, Paulo Dybala, Matias Suarez
The specs
Engine: Long-range single or dual motor with 200kW or 400kW battery
Transmission: Single-speed automatic
Max touring range: 620km / 590km
Price: From Dh250,000 (estimated)