There was a time when investors could rely on a steady global economy to make solid returns on their investments. But in a world where markets can plunge and soar by 3 per cent in a single day on nothing more than a rumour, their appetite for risk has vanished, writes Harvey Jones
These are strange days to be an investor.
Stock markets seem to have lost their direction, plunging every time the Greeks riot, Spanish bond yields soar, US jobs figures disappoint or Chinese growth slips.
Next day, they rebound, as the euro zone cobbles together another doomed rescue package, or the US Federal Reserve hints at more quantitative easing.
Shares aren't the only investments behaving strangely. Bonds, cash, currency and property are also reacting in a weird and irrational manner.
Strange days, indeed. But what can you do about it?
Crazy currencies
The US has a mind-boggling US$15.8 trillion (Dh58tn) national debt. It has the largest deficit of all the major economies, at 12.5 per cent of GDP. The Federal Reserve has been rampantly printing money through quantitative easing and is widely expected to print even more in the next few months. At the end of the year, the country will hit a so-called fiscal cliff, when taxes rise and government spending is cut, equal to a 4 per cent drop of GDP.
Given all these problems, you would expect the US dollar to be plunging in value, says Steve Gregory, the Dubai-based managing partner at Holborn Assets, the financial services company. "Instead, it has grown stronger and is now seen as the world's safe-haven currency."
Expatriate workers in the UAE should actually celebrate every time stock markets fall. "When investors panic, UAE expats can send money to their home country at more attractive exchange rates."
The Japanese yen is behaving even more strangely, says Chris Towner, the director of FX advisory services at HIFX, the currency transfer specialists. "No country owes more money than Japan, which has the world's highest GDP-to-debt ratio at more than 225 per cent. Yet the yen is now treated as the ultimate safe haven."
The truth is that currencies are engaged in an ugly contest. The US dollar and Japanese yen only look pretty because rivals, such as the euro and sterling, are even uglier.
Bizarre bonds
If currencies are acting strangely, the bond markets are weirder still.
Western governments owe so much money that it is astonishing anybody is willing to lend them more, yet they have never paid lower interest rates, says Ian Lance, the fund manager at RWC Enhanced Income, the mutual fund. "The US has 3.3 times more debt than a decade ago, but the interest rate it pays on that debt has plunged from 6 per cent to around 2 per cent."
Germany can borrow at zero per cent, despite being in the teeth of the euro-zone crisis. This means investors are actually paying the Germans to look after their cash.
Borrowing money may be cheaper than it has ever been but governments want it cheaper still. "Central banks are spending billions to force rates down just that little bit more," Mr Lance says.
Euro-zone chiefs are behaving ever more strangely. The European Central Bank (ECB) has been lending money to European banks at 1 per cent so that those banks can either lend the money to sovereign states by purchasing government bonds or dump it back on deposit with the ECB. "Everyone seems to think this is great but when Bernie Madoff did it, he was arrested," Mr Lance says.
Investors have also lost contact with reality. "Before the credit crunch, the ratings agencies rated more than 50,000 subprime collateralised debt obligations as 'AAA'. Yet the markets still hang on these agencies' every word."
Erratic equities
Stock markets are acting even more strangely. It is no longer seen as remarkable for share prices to soar or crash 3 per cent in a single session day, and on the slightest rumour.
West and East now play to a different set of rules. When China cut its growth forecasts to a mere 7 per cent a year, markets tumbled. Yet the US and Europe would kill for that kind of growth.
While governments and individuals are drowning in debt, corporate balance sheets are fatter than they have ever been. Businesses are sitting on a mountain of cash: S&P 500 companies are sitting on roughly $2tn alone.
Instead of ploughing the money profitably back into their company, they prefer to play it safe by sticking the money into government bonds or cash, despite getting a negative return after inflation. That's how broken the global economy is.
Cracked consumers
In hard times, people traditionally stop splashing out on luxuries and stick to the basics, such as food and housing. In this strange recession, the reverse has happened, says Mr Lance. "While some high-street retailers and supermarkets are posting their worst sales for 20 years, Burberry has seen sales grow 20 per cent and orders for new Bentleys are up 50 per cent."
As the poor get poorer, global fashion brands such as Louis Vuitton, Hermes, Gucci, Chanel, Rolex, Cartier and Tiffany's are seeing out the recession in style.
Strange days
Many of these problems have the same underlying cause, says Clem Chambers, the founder of Advfn.com, the stocks and shares website.
"Western governments have distorted global markets by driving down the returns on bonds and cash through their policy of slashing interest rates and printing money," Mr Chambers says. "Stock markets aren't functioning properly. The global economy isn't functioning properly. Politicians aren't functioning properly."
No wonder so many investors have lost their appetite for risk. "Markets are no longer efficient because they are no longer free. That makes it impossible to calculate risk and reward. You can't trust the stock market. You can't trust the banks. And you can't trust governments."
It could all end with a bang tomorrow, or the crisis might drag on for years. So how should investors respond? First, try to keep your head, even as all around you lose theirs.
Tackle your debts and don't risk money you can't afford to lose. Buy shares on the dips, rather than getting sucked into a short-lived rally. Look for cash-rich global companies paying attractive dividends, which you can reinvest for growth.
Diversify by spreading your money between equities, cash, bonds and property. Finally, invest for the long term, at least five or 10 years, to give you enough time to overcome today's turbulence.
The current craziness can't last forever. Or can it?
pf@thenational.ae
Company%20profile
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Kanguva
Director: Siva
Stars: Suriya, Bobby Deol, Disha Patani, Yogi Babu, Redin Kingsley
A%20QUIET%20PLACE
%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3EStarring%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20Lupita%20Nyong'o%2C%20Joseph%20Quinn%2C%20Djimon%20Hounsou%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3EDirector%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3EMichael%20Sarnoski%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3ERating%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%204%2F5%3C%2Fp%3E%0A
The specs
Engine: 3.9-litre twin-turbo V8
Power: 620hp from 5,750-7,500rpm
Torque: 760Nm from 3,000-5,750rpm
Transmission: Eight-speed dual-clutch auto
On sale: Now
Price: From Dh1.05 million ($286,000)
COMPANY PROFILE
Name: Qyubic
Started: October 2023
Founder: Namrata Raina
Based: Dubai
Sector: E-commerce
Current number of staff: 10
Investment stage: Pre-seed
Initial investment: Undisclosed
UAE currency: the story behind the money in your pockets
Nayanthara: Beyond The Fairy Tale
Starring: Nayanthara, Vignesh Shivan, Radhika Sarathkumar, Nagarjuna Akkineni
Director: Amith Krishnan
Rating: 3.5/5
'How To Build A Boat'
Jonathan Gornall, Simon & Schuster
COMPANY%20PROFILE%20
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ABU DHABI CARD
5pm: UAE Martyrs Cup (TB) Conditions; Dh90,000; 2,200m
5.30pm: Wathba Stallions Cup (PA) Handicap; Dh70,000; 1,400m
6pm: UAE Matyrs Trophy (PA) Maiden; Dh80,000; 1,600m
6.30pm: Sheikha Fatima bint Mubarak (IFAHR) Apprentice Championship (PA) Prestige; Dh100,000; 1,600m
7pm: Sheikha Fatima bint Mubarak (IFAHR) Ladies World Championship (PA) Prestige; Dh125,000; 1,600m
8pm: Sheikh Zayed bin Sultan Al Nahyan Jewel Crown (PA) Group 1; Dh5,000,000; 1,600m
How to protect yourself when air quality drops
Install an air filter in your home.
Close your windows and turn on the AC.
Shower or bath after being outside.
Wear a face mask.
Stay indoors when conditions are particularly poor.
If driving, turn your engine off when stationary.
Singham Again
Director: Rohit Shetty
Stars: Ajay Devgn, Kareena Kapoor Khan, Ranveer Singh, Akshay Kumar, Tiger Shroff, Deepika Padukone
Rating: 3/5
BLACK%20ADAM
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TEACHERS' PAY - WHAT YOU NEED TO KNOW
Pay varies significantly depending on the school, its rating and the curriculum. Here's a rough guide as of January 2021:
- top end schools tend to pay Dh16,000-17,000 a month - plus a monthly housing allowance of up to Dh6,000. These tend to be British curriculum schools rated 'outstanding' or 'very good', followed by American schools
- average salary across curriculums and skill levels is about Dh10,000, recruiters say
- it is becoming more common for schools to provide accommodation, sometimes in an apartment block with other teachers, rather than hand teachers a cash housing allowance
- some strong performing schools have cut back on salaries since the pandemic began, sometimes offering Dh16,000 including the housing allowance, which reflects the slump in rental costs, and sheer demand for jobs
- maths and science teachers are most in demand and some schools will pay up to Dh3,000 more than other teachers in recognition of their technical skills
- at the other end of the market, teachers in some Indian schools, where fees are lower and competition among applicants is intense, can be paid as low as Dh3,000 per month
- in Indian schools, it has also become common for teachers to share residential accommodation, living in a block with colleagues
Company%20Profile
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Disclaimer
Director: Alfonso Cuaron
Stars: Cate Blanchett, Kevin Kline, Lesley Manville
Rating: 4/5
The specs
Engine: 3.0-litre six-cylinder turbo
Power: 398hp from 5,250rpm
Torque: 580Nm at 1,900-4,800rpm
Transmission: Eight-speed auto
Fuel economy, combined: 6.5L/100km
On sale: December
Price: From Dh330,000 (estimate)
The specs
Engine: 1.5-litre turbo
Power: 181hp
Torque: 230Nm
Transmission: 6-speed automatic
Starting price: Dh79,000
On sale: Now
Cricket World Cup League 2
UAE squad
Rahul Chopra (captain), Aayan Afzal Khan, Ali Naseer, Aryansh Sharma, Basil Hameed, Dhruv Parashar, Junaid Siddique, Muhammad Farooq, Muhammad Jawadullah, Muhammad Waseem, Omid Rahman, Rahul Bhatia, Tanish Suri, Vishnu Sukumaran, Vriitya Aravind
Fixtures
Friday, November 1 – Oman v UAE
Sunday, November 3 – UAE v Netherlands
Thursday, November 7 – UAE v Oman
Saturday, November 9 – Netherlands v UAE
Company%20Profile
%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3EName%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20Neo%20Mobility%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EStarted%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20February%202023%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3ECo-founders%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20Abhishek%20Shah%20and%20Anish%20Garg%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EBased%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20Dubai%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EIndustry%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20Logistics%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EFunding%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20%2410%20million%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EInvestors%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20Delta%20Corp%2C%20Pyse%20Sustainability%20Fund%2C%20angel%20investors%3C%2Fp%3E%0A
Company%20Profile
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'Fantastic Beasts: The Secrets of Dumbledore'
Rating: 3/5
Directed by: David Yates
Starring: Mads Mikkelson, Eddie Redmayne, Ezra Miller, Jude Law
Citadel: Honey Bunny first episode
Directors: Raj & DK
Stars: Varun Dhawan, Samantha Ruth Prabhu, Kashvi Majmundar, Kay Kay Menon
Rating: 4/5
The specs
Engine: 77.4kW all-wheel-drive dual motor
Power: 320bhp
Torque: 605Nm
Transmission: Single-speed automatic
Price: From Dh219,000
On sale: Now
The specs
Engine: Direct injection 4-cylinder 1.4-litre
Power: 150hp
Torque: 250Nm
Price: From Dh139,000
On sale: Now
COMPANY%20PROFILE
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Milestones on the road to union
1970
October 26: Bahrain withdraws from a proposal to create a federation of nine with the seven Trucial States and Qatar.
December: Ahmed Al Suwaidi visits New York to discuss potential UN membership.
1971
March 1: Alex Douglas Hume, Conservative foreign secretary confirms that Britain will leave the Gulf and “strongly supports” the creation of a Union of Arab Emirates.
July 12: Historic meeting at which Sheikh Zayed and Sheikh Rashid make a binding agreement to create what will become the UAE.
July 18: It is announced that the UAE will be formed from six emirates, with a proposed constitution signed. RAK is not yet part of the agreement.
August 6: The fifth anniversary of Sheikh Zayed becoming Ruler of Abu Dhabi, with official celebrations deferred until later in the year.
August 15: Bahrain becomes independent.
September 3: Qatar becomes independent.
November 23-25: Meeting with Sheikh Zayed and Sheikh Rashid and senior British officials to fix December 2 as date of creation of the UAE.
November 29: At 5.30pm Iranian forces seize the Greater and Lesser Tunbs by force.
November 30: Despite a power sharing agreement, Tehran takes full control of Abu Musa.
November 31: UK officials visit all six participating Emirates to formally end the Trucial States treaties
December 2: 11am, Dubai. New Supreme Council formally elects Sheikh Zayed as President. Treaty of Friendship signed with the UK. 11.30am. Flag raising ceremony at Union House and Al Manhal Palace in Abu Dhabi witnessed by Sheikh Khalifa, then Crown Prince of Abu Dhabi.
December 6: Arab League formally admits the UAE. The first British Ambassador presents his credentials to Sheikh Zayed.
December 9: UAE joins the United Nations.
MATCH INFO
Uefa Champions League, Group B
Barcelona v Inter Milan
Camp Nou, Barcelona
Wednesday, 11pm (UAE)