Feel the fear all over again with It and other horror remakes



In 1990, the made-for-TV adaptation of Stephen King's It did for red-nosed children's entertainers what Spielberg's Jaws had done for large aquatic animals 15 years earlier. Tim Curry's portrayal of Pennywise the child-eating, drain-dwelling clown is likely to have seen bookings of magicians for birthday parties crash across the world, and numerous bright red wigs find themselves heading towards the dustbin.

The clowning community has had 22 years to recover its business, but there are no doubt going to be some upside-down smiles with the news that the wheels of an It remake by Warner Bros are gathering speed.

The latest update is that Cary Fukunaga, who directed the distinctly clown-free Jane Eyre, is at the helm and, perhaps most interestingly, the story will be split into two separate films. Given that the original book was some 1,138 pages and drifted between two periods, this makes good sense. (The original three-hour film was originally in two parts as well, but these are often just glued together when it is broadcast.)

But will it provoke the same reaction as the first ABC drama? Now that we've had more than two decades to get over the first Pennywise, will whoever steps into his oversized shoes have us hiding beneath the duvets again?

From recent horror remake experience, things aren't looking good.

Freddy Krueger might have been the stuff of nightmares beyond just the residents of Elm Street during the 1980s, but when he returned for an ill-conceived big-budget remake in 2010, the film was widely panned. It was a slick, visually stunning production, but the general consensus was that the 21st century A Nightmare on Elm Street simply wasn't anywhere near as scary as the razor-fingered, stripy jumper-wearer's first appearance in Wes Craven's low-budget original. "We've been there before," said one critic.

It was arguably another watching-through-your-fingers classic, The Texas Chain Saw Massacre, that kick-started the reboot trend. However, 2003's return for Tobe Hooper's monstrous Leatherface set the precedent for most that followed - upping the gore, throwing in Jessica Biel as bait, but sadly lacking in that crucial ability to have us too scared to turn off the lights.

There are several links between these high-earning but low-scoring remakes. The first is a certain Michael Bay, whose Platinum Dunes production company was behind them both, along with several other generally awful horror returns (most notably The Amityville Horror in 2005 and Friday the 13th in 2009).

The second is budget. It seems that a film's fright index has an inverse relationship to spending. For all its lack of screams, the new Elm Street cost US$35 million (Dh128.6m), compared with the original meagre-looking $1.8m. Tobe Hooper famously produced the first Chain Saw Massacre for under $300,000, a far cry from the $9.5m invested in the 2003 version. Psycho, one of several horror classics that underlined Hitchcock's ability to build more suspense than the Golden Gate Bridge with minimal resources, returned to screens in 1998 thanks to Gus Van Sant, in a scene-for-scene remake with all the suspense of a soufflé.

The image of Anthony Perkins's Norman Bates looking through "mother's" window is one for the film annuals. The idea of Vince Vaughn doing likewise is almost laughable. One critic noted that the only reason to even consider the film was to "see Anne Heche being assassinated".

Naturally, there are those that go against the trend. The cannibalistic mutants in Craven's cultish The Hills Have Eyes were brought back to life in 2006 by the French horror director Alexandre Aje (of recent Piranha 3D "fame") in a fast-paced remake that was largely well-received, despite an increase in gore more towards Saw-like "torture porn" levels.

And so to It.

There are actually several reasons why a return to clown-stalking small-town America could actually raise the fright factor.

The original It may have resulted in thousands of sleepless nights, but it was made for TV, not the big screen. Having a maniacal Pennywise the size of a small house bearing down on you, together with the special effects not available at the time, definitely sounds like something with significant wet seat potential.

Also, despite being three hours long, the 1990 film didn't do full justice to one of King's meatiest books, with various elements of the story missed in an effort to squeeze it all in. Having the film spread across two instalments should allow the more gruesome and adult content of the material to be covered.

Finally, and perhaps most importantly, Michael Bay seems to be nowhere near the project.

Here's to a whole new generation about to be terrified of clowns for the rest of their lives.

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The finalists

Player of the Century, 2001-2020: Cristiano Ronaldo (Juventus), Lionel Messi (Barcelona), Mohamed Salah (Liverpool), Ronaldinho

Coach of the Century, 2001-2020: Pep Guardiola (Manchester City), Jose Mourinho (Tottenham Hotspur), Zinedine Zidane (Real Madrid), Sir Alex Ferguson

Club of the Century, 2001-2020: Al Ahly (Egypt), Bayern Munich (Germany), Barcelona (Spain), Real Madrid (Spain)

Player of the Year: Cristiano Ronaldo, Lionel Messi, Robert Lewandowski (Bayern Munich)

Club of the Year: Bayern Munich, Liverpool, Real Madrid

Coach of the Year: Gian Piero Gasperini (Atalanta), Hans-Dieter Flick (Bayern Munich), Jurgen Klopp (Liverpool)

Agent of the Century, 2001-2020: Giovanni Branchini, Jorge Mendes, Mino Raiola

Abu Dhabi GP weekend schedule

Friday

First practice, 1pm 
Second practice, 5pm

Saturday

Final practice, 2pm
Qualifying, 5pm

Sunday

Etihad Airways Abu Dhabi Grand Prix (55 laps), 5.10pm

COMPANY PROFILE
Name: HyperSpace
 
Started: 2020
 
Founders: Alexander Heller, Rama Allen and Desi Gonzalez
 
Based: Dubai, UAE
 
Sector: Entertainment 
 
Number of staff: 210 
 
Investment raised: $75 million from investors including Galaxy Interactive, Riyadh Season, Sega Ventures and Apis Venture Partners
The specs
 
Engine: 3.0-litre six-cylinder turbo
Power: 398hp from 5,250rpm
Torque: 580Nm at 1,900-4,800rpm
Transmission: Eight-speed auto
Fuel economy, combined: 6.5L/100km
On sale: December
Price: From Dh330,000 (estimate)
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Jigra
Director: Vasan Bala
Starring: Alia Bhatt, Vedang Raina, Manoj Pahwa, Harsh Singh
Rated: 3.5/5
OTHER IPL BOWLING RECORDS

Best bowling figures: 6-14 – Sohail Tanvir (for Rajasthan Royals against Chennai Super Kings in 2008)

Best average: 16.36 – Andrew Tye

Best economy rate: 6.53 – Sunil Narine

Best strike-rate: 12.83 – Andrew Tye

Best strike-rate in an innings: 1.50 – Suresh Raina (for Chennai Super Kings against Rajasthan Royals in 2011)

Most runs conceded in an innings: 70 – Basil Thampi (for Sunrisers Hyderabad against Royal Challengers Bangalore in 2018)

Most hat-tricks: 3 – Amit Mishra

Most dot-balls: 1,128 – Harbhajan Singh

Most maiden overs bowled: 14 – Praveen Kumar

Most four-wicket hauls: 6 – Sunil Narine

 

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How to invest in gold

Investors can tap into the gold price by purchasing physical jewellery, coins and even gold bars, but these need to be stored safely and possibly insured.

A cheaper and more straightforward way to benefit from gold price growth is to buy an exchange-traded fund (ETF).

Most advisers suggest sticking to “physical” ETFs. These hold actual gold bullion, bars and coins in a vault on investors’ behalf. Others do not hold gold but use derivatives to track the price instead, adding an extra layer of risk. The two biggest physical gold ETFs are SPDR Gold Trust and iShares Gold Trust.

Another way to invest in gold’s success is to buy gold mining stocks, but Mr Gravier says this brings added risks and can be more volatile. “They have a serious downside potential should the price consolidate.”

Mr Kyprianou says gold and gold miners are two different asset classes. “One is a commodity and the other is a company stock, which means they behave differently.”

Mining companies are a business, susceptible to other market forces, such as worker availability, health and safety, strikes, debt levels, and so on. “These have nothing to do with gold at all. It means that some companies will survive, others won’t.”

By contrast, when gold is mined, it just sits in a vault. “It doesn’t even rust, which means it retains its value,” Mr Kyprianou says.

You may already have exposure to gold miners in your portfolio, say, through an international ETF or actively managed mutual fund.

You could spread this risk with an actively managed fund that invests in a spread of gold miners, with the best known being BlackRock Gold & General. It is up an incredible 55 per cent over the past year, and 240 per cent over five years. As always, past performance is no guide to the future.

COMPANY PROFILE
Name: Almnssa
Started: August 2020
Founder: Areej Selmi
Based: Gaza
Sectors: Internet, e-commerce
Investments: Grants/private funding
The biog

Name: Dhabia Khalifa AlQubaisi

Age: 23

How she spends spare time: Playing with cats at the clinic and feeding them

Inspiration: My father. He’s a hard working man who has been through a lot to provide us with everything we need

Favourite book: Attitude, emotions and the psychology of cats by Dr Nicholes Dodman

Favourit film: 101 Dalmatians - it remind me of my childhood and began my love of dogs 

Word of advice: By being patient, good things will come and by staying positive you’ll have the will to continue to love what you're doing

Titanium Escrow profile

Started: December 2016
Founder: Ibrahim Kamalmaz
Based: UAE
Sector: Finance / legal
Size: 3 employees, pre-revenue  
Stage: Early stage
Investors: Founder's friends and Family

In numbers: China in Dubai

The number of Chinese people living in Dubai: An estimated 200,000

Number of Chinese people in International City: Almost 50,000

Daily visitors to Dragon Mart in 2018/19: 120,000

Daily visitors to Dragon Mart in 2010: 20,000

Percentage increase in visitors in eight years: 500 per cent

WORLD'S%2010%20HIGHEST%20MOUNTAINS
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Tenet

Director: Christopher Nolan

Stars: John David Washington, Robert Pattinson, Elizabeth Debicki, Dimple Kapadia, Michael Caine, Kenneth Branagh 

Rating: 5/5