DUBAI // Experts have urged people to turn to professional help and erase the societal stigma linked to financial liabilities, stressing suicide is not the answer for families struggling with debt.
Family and friends must watch out for a critical juncture when a person takes the decision to commit suicide, said Dr Lavina Ahuja, a counselling psychologist who helps both workers and families.
“The biggest watch out point is when the person begins thinking, ‘I cannot improve my situation, there is no future, no life for me.’ That is when the person actually starts feeling better because although suicide is not the solution, to their mind they have found one,” she said.
“This is the critical time because people in depression don’t have the energy to follow through suicidal thoughts, but when they feel better they do. In a subtle way they will say goodbye or try to sort out their affairs and people can keep an eye out for that.”
She advices tackling the issue directly.
“There is this myth that you should not mention the word ‘suicide’ or you will give the person ideas,” she said.
“But it’s not a taboo word. You should bluntly ask the person, ‘Are you thinking about suicide?’ That is the most effective thing to do. He may not say, ‘Yes,’ but a door will now be open and he knows he can call you.”
Humiliation over unpaid bills prevents people from asking for help.
“It’s almost as if you’re admitting your shame to outsiders and this social taboo should be lifted because it’s the biggest reason people don’t come forward,” Dr Ahuja said.
“Removing the stigma will be the hardest challenge.”
The Indian community in the UAE was shaken last month when Dubai police said financial problems had led to the suicide of an Indian film producer and his family.
Officers found the bodies of Santosh Kumar, his wife Manju Menon and their daughter on July 15 when police broke into their apartment after relatives said they had not seen the family for a week.
About 100 Indians have committed suicide in the UAE every year for the past three years of roughly 1,300 deaths recorded, according to figures from the Indian embassy.
In the first half of this year, 37 Indian nationals took their lives in Dubai and the Northern Emirates, out of 544 reported deaths. The number of suicide cases because of spiralling debt was not available.
Aid workers regularly call and check on people who mention suicidal thoughts. They urge patience and put them in touch with professionals to help financially restructure debt.
“Debt is the result of bad decisions but that doesn’t mean it should lead to ending your own life,” said Dr Ahuja.
“You need to give them hope that this is not the only way out. You cannot say, ‘Don’t do this’ because then the person shuts off. The moment you start talking about morality and logic you have lost him. Their distorted logic comes from hopelessness and breaking that is important. You need to find something in that person’s life that is positive to show them that life does continue.”
rtalwar@thenational.ae